Zoo Magazine revamping digital presence *rolls eyes forever*

Zoo Magazine

Bauer Media, owners of Zoo Magazine, have announced that they are investing in Zoo’s digital media presence following the success of FHM’s ever increasing website. The article in pro-geek fest the NMA, read rather like a brand benevolently giving customers what they want. “Improving user experience, increasing ad proposition, yadayadayada” are all standard touch points for anyone wanting to capitalise on the trend shift in how we all consume media. This story is more inevitability than innovation.

But Zoo Magazine have an extra special reason for wanting to boost their digital publishing. Following a Home Office recommendation and continued campaigns from activist groups, this year some retailers agreed to put them on the top shelf. With the exception of WH Smith – who claimed placing them that 1.2m (the average height of a 7 year old) was a perfectly adequate measure – by power-buyers increasingly Zoo Magazine has been treated as porn.

Online, there are no such restrictions on age or exposure. Sure, to register you have to confirm your age, but there is no way of verifying user’s data. And besides, there’s plenty of content available on the home page without registration. In five minutes, I’d seen more finger blow jobs, panty tearing, doe eyes and tits than anyone could possibly stand on just one cup of tea. Is that really how women should be celebrated in a aspiring-to-equal society?

This sort of thing isn’t just bad for women, it’s bad for everyone. Of course, it promotes women as purely sex objects and endorses a synthetic and mostly unattainable beauty. But it makes an arse of men too, for falling for it. Zoo Magazine a big vajazzled dinosaur. May its asteroid be merciless and forthcoming… *eyeballs digital media buyers*

I couldn’t bring myself to link to their site. So instead, enjoy something else beautiful and splayed out awkwardly for your enjoyment…

Cute panda picture

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Saying goodbye to Busts 4 Justice…

Busts 4 Justice

I’ve known this day was coming, but today when I looked at the Busts 4 Justice Facebook today with a heavy heart I knew that, finally, it was time. Facebook have been archiving old group pages and confining them to the cached depths of the internet. And now, Busts 4 Justice – the page that brought down Marks & Spencer and finally stood up against poor DD+ practice on the UK high street and beyond – is to be retired.

Of course, Busts 4 Justice will live on – on this webpage, on Twitter, on Google+ (ha!), and even on Facebook in the form of a brand spanking new Page. It will continue to celebrate bra heros and challenge bra villains, and will bust for justice until poor fit and awful access is stamped out. In many respects, nothing has changed. But I can’t help feel nostalgic for the original incarnation of the group that took on M&S back in 2008.

That night working late in my bedroom, thinking up puns and ambling through Google image searches in an attempt to find the perfect thumbnail, I couldn’t have predicted the trajectory my life was about to spin off in.

It changed my life only for the better. I owe that Group page a lot, and I couldn’t let it slip away without a thank you. Busts 4 Justice 1.0 = you were wonderful.

Find Busts 4 Justice’s new home on Facebook here.

 

For my self-esteem and sanity I’ve tried to avoid YouTube but I’ll make an exception today. Here is our moment of triumph. Well, the moment of triumph that wasn’t me being told the day before over the phone in my bedroom before jumping up and down and bursting in tears….

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The horror…

The Quadraboob Boobie Trap Bra Fitting PosterThe Shelf Boobie Trap Bra Fitting PosterThe Sagging Boobie Trap Bra Fitting Poster
Ladies beware…

I can’t help but love Canadian boutique The Boobie Trap for these quirky ‘fitting horror’ posters designed to encourage women to be professionally fitted. The Quadraboob, The Shelf, and The Sagging are all familiar fears, associated with body-image traumas that though laid to rest, still creep from their cranial crypt when I least expect it…

Why not save your still squished loved ones from the horror and read them a bedtime story…?

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Wearing your bra size on your sleeve (and other places…)

Change Lingerie

My bra size has been Googleable for at least three years now, so it’s easy for me to forget that some people are sensitive about strangers being intimate about their intimates. For me 30G is just a matter of fact, and if anything sharing that fact with everyone has only been a positive thing. The conversation almost always goes the same way:

Q: So what size are you, if you don’t mind me asking?

A: 30G. 28GG sometimes.

Q: That’s massive! Wait… you don’t really look that big…

A: I’m not that big. I’m a only a 30G, and I’m in the right sized bra.

Q: Oh. Oh I see. I wonder if…

A: *whips out tape measure* Let’s see…

Without me even trying, my magic number regularly helps persuade +4 victims reconsider their own sizing. Even if I felt embarrassed by people knowing it, I wouldn’t do anything to hide it because I care about women getting the enhancing and empowering benefits of finding the right fit. I’m sure any DD+ blogger or business would say the same thing: it’s personal for us because it’s personal to everyone.

Which is why I was surprised to read that employees of Scandinavian lingerie brand Change were threatening to sue their employers for introducing name tags with their bra sizes on. Employees claim that the measure, which is designed to be a fitting reference for shoppers, has been embarrassing, and their union has suggested it is even illegal.

I don’t get it. For me, it seems impossible to be in this industry without being affected by the personal stories of women with body issues and even health issues directly linked – or at the very least amplified – by poor fitting lingerie. As an assistant in a store that boasts one of the very few to-a-J-cup ranges in the European market, you’d think fit would be a point of passion. How could a policy – indeed, a voluntary policy – designed to help the women you are working to help upset you so much?

Embarrassment, lechery and misogyny are all manageable with good friends, a sense of humour, and a neat line in sharp comebacks: but nothing helps persuade a nervous +4-er to try a proper fitting like identifying with other women’s bodies. The only reservation I have is whether or not the sizes they’re wearing are accurate… Is anyone near a store to have a look? And furthermore, how cute is the Tania?

Change Lingerie

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Mimi Holliday to launch men’s range in time for Christmas

Mimi Holliday launch boxer shorts for ChristmasMimi Holliday, home of beautiful delicates up to a restricted G cup, are expanding to cater for men’s nether regions with a new line of beautiful and quirky boxer shorts in time for Christmas.

The shorts will come in a variety of colours and patterns, and make an excellent stocking filler for the gentlemen in your life. Specifically for the gentleman in your life who will let you borrow them from time to time. They’re far too pretty not to be borrowed as around-the-house/sleep shorts from time to time…

Or perhaps if your bottom sizes don’t correspond, you could always wrap yourself in this from Mimi Holliday’s Tarte Tatin selection… It’s for Christmas, after all…

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